Writing at the Speed of Life: Why Word Pacing is Super Critical

As writers, we agonize, sometimes for hours, over the exact words to use, whether it’s finding just the right turn of phrase to perfectly describe a setting or arranging a conversation between characters to make it not only fit who they are but also believable. This is true not just in books but in every form of writing.

In my day job, the words and phrases I piece together become money-making emails and online banners for several major corporations and smaller companies. I’ve also published a spy novel, a non-fiction book on real estate (now out of print), and a second non-fiction book, this one on baseball umpires.

When I wrote the novel, I had to pay rapt attention not only to the words each character spoke and the adjectives and adverbs in the action scenes (there are many) but also the pacing. Draggy dialog and bogged down action are fatal to the reader’s experience. For characters to be relatable, they should sound like human beings, not robots, with all their foibles, grammatical miscues, and incomplete sentences.

Dialog should sound like dialog.

And so should advertising copy.

“Wait, what?” you say. “Ad copy should sound like dialog?”

Yes. Here’s why.

Advertising is really just a not-so-subtle instruction to take action. The advertiser wants you to get up and buy this product! Jump in the car! Hop online! Call the 1-800 number! Do something! Don’t just sit there!

Just do it!

Which brings me to why pacing matters.

Imagine if athletic shoe giant Nike (no, I don’t work for them, so this is not a shameless plug) changed their world famous slogan to something less catchy.

Maybe “Just Implement It” or “Consider Moving Along.”

While both of those phrases technically say the same thing as “Just Do It,” how motivated are you by either of the alternatives?

See, by whittling down the slogan to three monosyllabic words, Nike accomplished three things really simply:

  1. They made the slogan ridiculously easy to remember. Think about the next time you try to talk yourself into doing something you really don’t want to do, such as taking out that tree stump or cleaning out the garage. You finally tell yourself “just do it” and voila! Nike comes to mind. And you weren’t even thinking about shoes. But you are now.
  2. They keyed in on the core value that all Nike customers want: achievement. Whether it’s an Ironman Triathlon, finishing your first 5K, improving your golf game, or just fitting into The In Crowd with the latest athletic footwear or a swoosh on their hat.
  3. They transformed Nike from a shoe company into a marketing/communications company that happens to sell shoes, much the same way marketing giant Apple sells computers and other electronic goods: by tapping first into the customer’s perceived emotional need.

What Nike understands better than anyone else is how to push their customers’ buttons.

And they do it by being simple and quick.

“Just Do It” was just the start.

Pacing is all about using not just the right number of words in a sentence but the right number of syllables in the right cadence.

Go back to the Nike alternatives. Neither of them works because they are too long and require readers to think too hard to get the point. And we know from experience that they won’t. If customers don’t get it instantly, they’ll simply quit.

Mission failed. Customer lost. Revenue lost. Time and effort wasted.

Notice how I paced that last short paragraph. I could have used complete sentences to make it grammatically correct, but you would have been bored and subconsciously edited it as you read, distracting you from the message.

But by breaking it up into tinier bites, you ate it quickly and moved on. Plus, by using clipped phrases in a fast sequence, they became punchier, more impactful. (See how I did it again?)

With all this talk about quick hit copy, it is important to recognize that it’s not just about being quick. It’s about finding the right pace for the moment.

Sometimes slowing down is better.

For instance, say you’re advertising a day spa designed for total relaxation, with soothing steam rooms, soft terrycloth robes, and relaxed couples massage. Paint that picture using long, drawn out phrases and sentences, with adjective-laced lists, each one building upon the last, floating the reader gently along with you as you describing in soothing details all the relaxing amenities she will enjoy as she lets the world go by around her while she pampers herself in pure luxury.

You just sighed. And your shoulders dropped a bit as tension exited your body. It’s amazing what a mental picture can do.

You also began to read more slowly around the time you reached “soothing steam rooms, soft terrycloth robes, and relaxed couples massage.”

Words have a physical effect on the human body just as much as watching a movie or television show. Study someone’s facial expressions when they read a book. While their reactions will not be as dramatic as the instant feedback of a TV viewer, readers still react to what they are reading with the same emotional cues of sadness, glee, or fright.

Whatever you write – be it books, articles, blog posts, or ad copy – be mindful not just of the accuracy of the words you choose but of the pacing of how they string together.

Does the rate fit the goal? Does it need to speed up or slow down?

Read it aloud. Does it sound like you intend it? Does it sound like a conversation, even if it’s one-sided? If so, success!

If not, rewrite until it does.

What Spooks Really Do

I write spy thrillers. At least one so far. I’m working on the sequel. When people ask me to describe my main character, Gordon McAllister, I’m sort of at a loss for words. He’s an assassin, but he’s also an executive recruiter, a perfect cover that allows him to travel without drawing attention to his real mission. He’s not James Bond, not Jack Bauer, not Jason Bourne (what is it with J first names in the assassin biz?), or an amalgamation of any of them. He’s an ordinary man by design. Sure, he’s a trained killer, someone you don’t meet every day.

Or do you?

See, the best covert operatives never look the part. They don’t have the carefully arranged hair, the chiseled jaw, the perfect physique. The best covert operatives don’t look any different from the rest of us. That’s by design. It’s kind of hard to be covert if you stand out in a crowd.

Fellow author Piper Bayard writes with a partner who is one of those real life covert operatives, or “spooks” as they are called in the industry.

So what do spooks do in real life? How is the real world of covert ops different from Hollywood’s usually inaccurate portrayal? Let’s go straight to the source:

http://piperbayard.wordpress.com/2014/03/31/james-bond-vs-the-spook/

 

A Tribute to Tom Clancy

Novelist Tom Clancy, who rose from obscurity as an insurance salesman in Frederick, Maryland, to become one of the bestselling authors of all time, passed away yesterday (October 2) at age 66 from what media sources call “a brief illness.” Clancy’s mark will not soon be forgotten, as he single-handedly forged a new niche in literature: the techno-thriller.

Throughout Clancy’s storied (pun intended) career, he always had a knack for both assisting the intelligence community and at the same time keeping it on edge with his all-too-realistic plots centered so tightly around current events that many readers wondered if Clancy himself had an inside track and access to information the public didn’t – and wasn’t supposed to – know.

Even seasoned editors and publishers were initially leery of printing his material because of its amazing detail and realism. Rumor has it that when Clancy first shopped The Hunt for Red October, all the major publishers turned him down, for fear they would have the CIA breathing down their necks. Finally, the Naval Institute Press, best known for their periodical Proceedings, in which Clancy had written an article on ICBMs, agreed to pick up the novel when they realized all of Clancy’s highly detailed and frighteningly accurate data on submarine warfare came from Jane’s Fighting Ships and other public sources. Clancy himself said his greatest source was his local library.

Of course, Red October launched his writing career and later became a blockbuster movie directed by Die Hard’s John McTiernan and starring Sean Connery as the Red October’s captain and Alec Baldwin as CIA analyst Jack Ryan, a character Clancy would carry over into many of his later works.

One of Clancy’s most controversial plot lines appeared in 1994’s Debt of Honor, where the main villain crashes a 747 into the US Capitol building during the State of the Union Address, throwing the country into a state of terror and confusion as the President, Congress, and Supreme Court justices are wiped out in the explosion, essentially eliminating most of the US government in one fell swoop. This was the first time this sort of terror tactic had been part of a bestselling book, and many people wondered after September 11 if Clancy had simply been prescient in his awareness of the kind of harm such a thing could inflict or whether he should have kept it to himself.

I have a personal connection to Clancy that has lasted for decades. No, I never met the man, but I didn’t have to. His work is what got me interested in writing. The Hunt for Red October inspired me to become an avid reader, opening up a new world of opportunity I could never have imagined on my own. So it’s no coincidence that my first (and next) novel mimics much of Clancy’s eye for detail and believable plotting, to the point where I have enlisted experts in the field to help me get it right.

For all the criticism Clancy received over the years about stilted dialogue and “phoning in” his last few books, he was truly a literary pioneer, establishing a whole new genre that has taken the world by storm. His style inspired other bestselling authors, such as Vince Flynn (who also passed away this year), Brad Thor, Larry Bond, Dale Brown, and others. May he posthumously inspire many more!

Interview with Lisa Ballantyne, Author of The Guilty One

Every once in a while, I open the mailbox and inside sits a padded, brown envelope about the size of a book. I start to get excited. Then I pull it out and read the return address. More often than not, it’s from a publisher. Excitement turns to thrill as I tear open the package to see which book it is, because it’s not a book I ordered. It was sent to me because I’m on the list of reviewers for several major publishing houses, and the book in my hand is an Advance Reader’s Copy (ARC), one the public hasn’t seen yet — an extra thrill. But this is where the thrill might continue to build or vanish entirely.

Guilty OneLike any reader, the first thing I do is “judge the book by the cover.” Admit it: we all do it. Part of that cover includes the back, the synopsis. When I’m considering purchasing a book, I judge it entirely on the storyline on the back. Like it, buy it. But as a reviewer, the synopsis simply serves as an intro to give me an idea how much I’ll like this book that I promised to read.

When my ARC of The Guilty One by Scottish author Lisa Ballantyne arrived, I loved the cover art and design. It caught my attention immediately. Then I flipped it over and read the synopsis. Two points. We were off to a good start. That evening, I opened and read the first chapter and knew I was going to like the book. I was right. It almost went by too quickly.

The story Lisa Ballantyne has crafted is both moving and inspirational, yet gritty and realistic. She has created characters with meaning and depth. And her plethoric use of amazingly detailed descriptions was so vivid I felt like I was standing not in the rooms of a fictional book but right there in the heart of the English countryside, a place I’ve never seen in person.

I loved the book so much I contacted HarperCollins and requested an author interview, which Lisa graciously granted.

————–

Lisa, as an author myself I’m always curious to know what influences writers to create their stories and characters. Why did you write The Guilty One? What inspired you to create Daniel, Minnie, Sebastian, and the other cast members? And why this storyline?

I wrote this book because the characters of Daniel and Minnie began to ‘inhabit me’, right down to the smell of them. After musing on their relationship I realised this story was being told by Daniel as an adult; I could see him in a suit in London. Later on, I discovered he was a solicitor and it was only then I had the idea of giving him a client who was a young child on trial for murder – in order to throw Daniel’s own troubled childhood into relief. I wrote this book purely because the characters came to me and demanded to be written.

However, for a long time, I have been interested in choice, free will and nature versus nurture. I think we are finding out more every day about the interplay between nature, nurture and free will. There can be no doubt that people’s upbringing and neurological wiring has a huge impact on their future choices, but that does not diminish the power of free will. My personal view is that nothing is inevitable. Science has shown that even people with genetic variants and brain activity indicative of sociopaths can still lead productive, moral lives. I am wary of anyone who would wish to simplify what is a very complex equation. Human beings are fascinating and complex which is wonderful for fiction. I am sure that my own interest in this subject area fuelled the themes of the book.

Your writing style and attention to detail really made the characters jump off the page. I felt like I could sit down and have a cup of coffee with all of them. How do you go about creating believable and relatable characters?

Thank you so much for your kind comments. There really is no greater compliment for a writer than readers believing in her characters. My characters  remain the only reason I write. I love them and I want to do them justice. I myself am not sure how their creation happens. It is almost as if I gradually become aware of them as real people and then the plot evolves through understanding their foibles and traits.

How much research did you have to do for the scenes in Old Bailey? Did you sit in on any proceedings or interview anyone in the criminal justice system?

The whole novel required a substantial amount of research: even the locations of  London, Newcastle and Cumbria were unfamiliar to me. However I did have to particularly research the criminal justice system in England and this took up a lot of time. I visited the Old Bailey in London three times and sat in on ongoing cases, and I also had the help of a Scottish criminal solicitor, who helped me to understand how a case would be argued in court and what Sebastian would experience before trial.

As authors, we all enlist the help of experts for the storyline details. Did you know a lot about the British juvenile justice system already or did you seek help for that?

The legal system in Scotland (where I am from) and England are different, so even with my solicitor’s help I still had to cross reference against the English context. Despite the fact that there was an enormous amount of research required, it was hugely enjoyable. Once again, my interest in the characters fueled my research. It was like stalking my own imagination.

How long did it take for you to create The Guilty One from idea to finished book?

From idea to completed draft which I sent to the publishers – 12 or thirteen months – but then there was an editing process to follow which took about 6 months.

I loved the back and forth between Daniel’s childhood and the present. What made you decide to write it that way?

I think that novels tell the writer how they will be written rather than the other way around. This narrative method was the only way that this book would work; it was the way that this story wanted to be told.

Is this the first of a series or a stand-alone book?

I see this as a stand-alone book, but I will likely continue to be interested in and write about the themes in this novel.

What is the future for Daniel and Irene?

They are lovely. They are the hope. I think Daniel learns a lot in this novel, about love and trust; and hopefully he will bring that new insight to his developing relationship with Irene. I wish them well.

Are you working on any other projects right now?

I am working hard on my new novel which I hope to publish soon.

How can people get a hold of your books?

The Guilty One is available at all major book retailers including Amazon, Barnes & Noble, iBookstore and many others. Visit HarperCollins.com for a full list.

Inspiration Found…Where?

Hollywood is running out of ideas. They just are. Between all the stupidly formulaic television shows (one of many reasons we no longer have cable in our house) and the humdrum remakes of both formerly good TV shows and movies — they should have left well enough alone — it seems as if the major networks and studios have just thrown up their hands and quit trying to create anything original or unique. If you watch primetime TV, you’ll see the very same storylines, the very same plot twists, the very same character triggers, the very same everything from show to show but with different actors and costumes.

Now, I realize that to a certain extent fiction has to be formulaic. Scene and story structure have to be there to move the story and characters along, whether on screen or in a book. So I don’t fault the writers entirely for writing this way. And apparently these shows are selling commercial air time, which is what TV is all about anyway. The movie industry is suffering, but that’s mostly a format issue — people waiting for the DVD or Netflix, thanks to high ticket prices and improved home theater technologies.

But whatever happened to the art of storytelling? Why does Hollywood tell the same story over and over, usually making it worse each time? Why is this happening? Why can’t they come up with new characters, new stories, new plots?

When the Fox hit show 24 debuted in November 2001, it truly was a revolutionary show. In fact, when Keiffer Sutherland first pitched the idea of a show where the action took place in real time and each episode was an actual hour, the network execs with their heads in the sand balked at it and said it would never work. He was convinced it would, and eight seasons and 18 Emmys (out of over 30 nominations) later, apparently he was right.

Revolution is NBC’s newest attempt at something, well, revolutionary. And it works. It’s a premise that has been tried in books and movies before, but never in television to this extent. I was hooked from the pilot and will be watching when the series resumes March 25.

I say all of this as a lead in to a question for all my author friends: Where do you find your inspiration for what you write? What do you do to keep it fresh, so you don’t just repeat what every other author is writing out there? And how do you balance that with the need for story structure?

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